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Tuesday 11 October 2011

With Kochi out, Sreesanth inquires if he can train cheerleaders in IPL


Kochi. After BCCI terminated Kochi Tuskers Kerala’s franchise and ruled out return of the IPL team for the 2012 edition of the Indian Premier League, Sreesanth, one of the home members of KTK, has asked BCCI if he could take part in the 2012 IPL as the official trainer of all cheerleaders.
Sreesanth, along with other members of the KTK, could get an option of playing for other IPL teams in wake of KTK being suspended, but the fast bowler, who is also a passionate dancer, chose to train cheerleaders instead of being auctioned again.
“Yes, we have received a request to this effect and we are considering it,” BCCI president N Srinivasan told Faking News, “But the problem is BCCI doesn’t train the cheerleaders; they are directly employed by the franchises, so I don’t know how will this work.”
Sreesanth and Surveen Chawla
Sreesanth’s official avatar?
However sources suggest that BCCI could indeed appoint Sreesanth as the official head of all the cheerleaders, but not because of his dancing skills.
“A cheerleader’s blog had caused some embarrassment to the board last year and they had been looking to bring all the cheerleader’s under BCCI’s direct control ever since,” a source revealed, “Sreesanth’s employment could become a good excuse for satisfying  board’s obsession with controlling everything related to cricket in India.”
Sources further inform that BCCI, which had suspended Rajasthan and Punjab IPL teams last year but later revoked their suspension, is making sure that they don’t suspend more than one franchise in one go, as such franchises could gang up with suspended IPL chairman Lalit Modi and start some suspended premier league.
“Lalit Modi had approached both Shilpa Shetty and Preity Zinta last year but the coup was defeated by the BCCI at the last moment as Lalit was too busy chatting about fashion bags before coming to the point. This year they have played their cards intelligently, by suspending only one team, and that too a team that is not a favorite of Lalit Modi,” the source said.
Unaware of all this, Sreesanth is hopeful of getting his dream job of training the cheerleaders in the next year’s IPL. Sree rejected charges that he was doing so because he didn’t want to lose the IPL contract money.
“If I wanted to make money through dancing, I’d have become a dancer at Sri Padmanabhaswamy temple,” the fast bowler said. He refused to comment on demands from some quarters asking the treasure rich temple to pay the money on behalf of KTK, thus truly making KTK “God’s own IPL team”.
Meanwhile, Ravindra Jadeja, another KTK player, is still clueless on what he should be doing in wake of suspension of Kochi. According to sources, Jadeja has been advised to do nothing, as last time he tried to do something, in 2010, he wasbanned from that year’s IPL.

Saturday 1 October 2011

I saw Tendulkar running between wickets on a horse: Afridi


Islamabad, Pakistan. In a sensational disclosure, Pakistani cricketer Shahid Afridi has claimed that Indian batsman Sachin Tendulkar cheated by riding a horse to cover the distance between the wickets when he should have been using his legs. Afridi said that Sachin rode the horse again and again and went on to score a century against Pakistan in a 2005 ODI match at Ahmedabad, which India lost by 3 wickets.
“I clearly saw it,” Afridi recalled, “India batted first and I still remember Sachin and Sehwag coming out in the field riding on a big white horse, which had a pink tail and red hoofs. The reins of the horse were held by Sachin while Sehwag was riding behind him, clutching onto him like a baby.”
“I thought it was some Indian way to make a grand entry as they do in various events and ceremonies, so I kept quiet at that moment,” Afridi said, “But I was surprised when the horse stood back on the field even as Sachin and Sehwag took charge to bat.”
Afridi claims that he took up the issue with ground umpires, but both of them failed to see any horse on the field. He even asked them to call up the third umpire and verify it through video recordings, but shockingly even the third umpire couldn’t spot any horse on the ground.
“It was shocking,” Afridi shared his frustration, “We always knew that India cheated and used unfair means through BCCI, but this was a total shocker. Even now when I go back and look at the match recordings, I don’t see any horse. Clearly, they have used advanced technology and removed the horse from the recordings.”
Sachin Tendulkar riding a horse
Sachin Tendulkar, as seen by Shahid Afridi.
Afridi claims that he had to continue with the match as Inzamam-ul-Haq, the captain of Pakistani team in that match, too failed to see the horse and instead asked Afridi to concentrate on the match.
“This totally broke my confidence and I couldn’t take any wickets in the match,” Afridi revealed the hitherto secret incidents that took place six years ago, “I couldn’t believe when people failed to see Sachin getting on the horse as soon as he played a shot and going to the other end riding on a horse.”
“This was the reason Sehwag got run out,” Afridi provided a “proof” to back his allegations, “Sehwag failed to match the pace of the horse. Next batsman in was Dhoni, who could run as fast as the horse, so he didn’t get run out, but he was surprisingly caught by Kamran Akmal behind the wicket. The next one to follow was Ganguly, who again failed to match the pace of the horse and got run out. All these are documented, you can check it.”
“All the Indian players knew that there was a horse on the field for Sachin,” he further disclosed, “Harbhajan Singh, who was the 12th man in the match, used to bring green grass laced with Horlicks for the horse after each over. The horse did all the running for Sachin.”
Afridi claimed that Sachin scored as many as 63 runs while riding a horse, which was a blatant violation of ICC rules and proved that Sachin was not any great batsman.
“Who knows he might have used the same horse to score his double century in the ODI against South Africa last year,” Afridi alleged.
Afridi said that he was silent all these years as Pakistan eventually went on to win the match. “God punished them for using unfair means,” he said, “But Sachin was riding the horse even while fielding. It’s such a shame that I was declared out caught by Sachin riding a horse.”
The former Pakistani captain, who is currently under conditional retirement, claims that he will disclose more such startling truths in his upcoming autobiography named “From the horse’s mouth”.

Government to officially close the matter of 2G scam on Dussehra


New Delhi. After the controversial 2G note matter was closed in a 10-minutes press briefing on Thursday, government has decided to close the larger matter of 2G scam itself and put a conclusive end to the whole affair. After consulting various ministers and advisors, the UPA government has announced that it will officially close the matter of 2G scam on Dussehra, which is less than a week away.
“The views expressed by the CAG in their report are not their own,” Union Minister Kapil Sibal explained why the government thought that the matter should be closed.
Manmohan Singh showing victory sign
Prime Minister is reported to have given green signal to the whole proposal
“Recent reports have suggested that initially an internal audit by CAG had put the notional loss in the 2G spectrum allocation case to a muchlower figure, which was overturned by the CAG headquarters,” Sibal explained, “This clearly shows that the CAG report doesn’t reflect the views of the CAG as an institution, much like the 2G note didn’t reflect the views of the government.”
Drawing parallels between the 2G note and the CAG report, Kapil Sibal further said that both the documents were just a “routine” communication between various government agencies, which were misreported widely by the media and misinterpreted by the public.
“Fortunately, under the able guidance of Madam Gandhi, we could close the matter around the 2G note,” he said, “And now is the turn of the CAG report – a matter that will be closed for good on the auspicious day of Dussehra.”
Sibal refused to divulge the details on how the government intends to close the matter, but sources tell Faking News that the process might not take more than 10 minutes, as was the case with closure of the matter arising out the 2G note.
“I think they are going to make a Raavan effigy out of the CAG report on Dussheraand Rahul Gandhi, acting as Lord Rama, will burn down the effigy with a burning arrow made out of the CBI charge-sheet,” Ravindra Chaudhary, an expert visualized the closure of the 2G spectrum allocation scam.
On being asked why he thinks Congress could take help of religious symbols, which almost makes it appear like the BJP, Ravindra said, “Congress has been claiming that they just followed the policy of the BJP government in the 2G spectrum allocation, so I guess they’d do the same even while closing this matter.”
However Congress has rejected such visualizations as figment of imagination of a few people and has blamed the BJP for spreading misinformation.
“All I want to say right now is that there was no scam. There was no loss and no rules were broken,” Kapil Sibal reiterated, “I am happy that the matter will be closed.”

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