What new color should Manmohan Singh try for his turban?

Many people have often wondered why our beloved Prime Minister always wears blue turban. Although he looks cool in that color, won’t it be a little worthwhile if he tried some different color for a change? Today Faking News asks its readers to pick a new color for the turban of our Prime Minister that they think would look good on him. Our editorial team has shortlisted four colors and appeal to our readers to choose one of them.

The following picture would help you visualize how Hon’ble Manmohan Singh would look in each of those four colors. Take a look and take a pick.

A new look for Prime Minister Manmohan Singh

What new color should Prime Minister try for his turban?

A (Saffron)B (Yellow)C (Green)D (Pink)

VoteView ResultsPolldaddy.com

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Manmohan Singh gets retirement plan offers after Rahul Gandhi’s promotion

Few hours after Rahul Gandhi was officially given a bigger role by being appointed the Vice President of  the Congress party, Prime Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh got a few mailers in his inbox offering him retirement plans.

One of the mailers looked like this:

Sources say Dr. Singh is seriously considering to buy a plan before the economy takes further bad shape or before someone worse than him becomes the Prime Minister.

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BJP supporters start petition urging Deepika Padukone to date Rahul Gandhi

New Delhi. Frustrated by the inability of their own party leaders, some BJP supporters have decided to take matters into their own hands to ensure a BJP victory in the 2014 general elections. A group of these supporters has started an online petition urging Bollywood star Deepika Padukone to date Rahul Gandhi, the preordained Prime Ministerial candidate of the ruling UPA alliance.

Explaining the rationale behind this petition, Mr. Rahul Gupta the representative of the group said, “We were celebrating couple of days back when we heard that Rahul Gandhi will lead UPA campaign during 2014 elections but BJP is trying hard to level the playing field by electing Nitin Gadkari as the party president once again. We need something to gain the edge again and looking at Deepika ji’s track record, she may be the ideal person to pull down Rahul Gandhi, even below Nitin Gadkari.”

He added, “When talented people like Yuvraj Singh and Ranbir Kapoor started struggling while dating her then what chance does Rahul ji have? Rahul ji is more in league with Siddharth Mallaya and look what happened to not just him but his father too. We hope for a similar bankruptcy for Mrs. Gandhi after her son dates Deepika.”

Deepika is reported to be a bit taller than Rahul, but BJP supporters say that it won’t be a problem as Rahul Gandhi is known to like bigger roles.

“Rahul Gandhi said in his speech that he loved to play Badminton and Deepika Padukone is the daughter of the best Badminton player India ever produced. She played Badminton herself before entering Bollywood so Rahul ji will be interested in her. That could be the starting point of their relationship”, a hopeful Mr. Gupta went on to add.

However, experts are not too optimistic about this match as Deepika Padukone doesn’t belong to any Minority or Dalit Community so Rahul Gandhi is unlikely to meet her with too much warmth.

BJP President, Mr. Nitin Gadkari meanwhile has refused to take it as a condemnation of his leadership. Mr. Gadkari said, “How can they not be comfortable with my leadership if they are working so hard to ensure we win the elections with me as the president. We need to promote this out of the box thinking culture. Maybe, they can join Purti Group once this mission is accomplished, we need such smart thinkers in our company.”

Meanwhile, leading journalists and thinkers, especially those on Twitter, have termed this petition a result of “misogyny” and “patriarchal mindset” because it discounts the will and views of Deepika Padukone about Rahul Gandhi.

Ms. Padukone was unavailable for a comment but the online petition has already got 14,589 signatures and Mr. Gupta plans to submit the application to Deepika after reaching 100,000 signatures.

As per sources within this support group, Siddharth Mallaya and Dr. Vijay Mallaya were the first to sign this petition.

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Footpath officially announced as the two-wheeler lane in Bangalore

Bangalore. The footpaths across all the roads in Bangalore were today officially announced as the two-wheeler lane by the Bangalore traffic police in a bid to counter increasing jams happening all over the city.

“We noticed several times that people on bikes always preferred driving in the footpath even if the roads were free. Maybe they got into that habit while driving during peak traffic. But we thought it was a great idea,” said a traffic sergeant in the Basavangudi area.

However, the traffic police department has clarified that it won’t show similar cooperation if the bikers start entering shops or houses next to the footpaths seeking shortcuts.

A biker enjoying his official driving lane

The announcement has caused the two-wheeler riders fly in joy. “It used to take 2 hours for me to reach my office which is 5 KMs away from my house. Now I can get an extra hour of morning sleep,” grinned an office goer in Indira Nagar area.

“Yes, we won’t try to enter shops or houses next to the footpaths,” he added, “But we should be allowed to park our bikes in those shops and houses as we can’t park our bike on footpaths anymore.”

“Apart from easing traffic, this will also increase the productivity in our company,” a senior HR manager from a famous IT company welcomed the step, “Most of the employees takeWork from Home option at least thrice a week citing the traffic problems and go for movies struggling in the same traffic. Now we can pull them out for work.”

Being a democratic society, there were people who were unhappy too.

A group of protesters were seen shouting slogans in front of the traffic commissioner’s office. One of the protesters, a leader of the auto drivers’ union, demanded that auto rickshaws too should also be allowed to ride through the footpaths; else they could start parking their autos on footpaths.

Apart from the auto-rickshaw drivers, the footpath vendors too are angry. They fear losing their marketplace and thus have demanded to be allow to open their shops in the Center Meridian of the roads.

When asked for a response, most of the pedestrians, whom the footpaths are originally meant for, told Faking News that they didn’t find any difference.

“I don’t remember when I used footpath last. Bikers, vendors, and jobless people were always occupying that space. Doesn’t make any difference to me,” a local resident claimed.

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